Isolation by others as a form of DV

Last week, we discussed how willful isolation by a spouse, even in the absence of physical or sexual violence, is a form of DV. Unfortunately, isolation by spouse usually leads to or is co-present with other forms of isolation.

Isolation from others: In her interviews, Abraham finds that the very act of moving to the US is socially isolating, since the wife is leaving behind family, friends, and other support systems. The relationships that she forms in the US are often based on the husband’s existing friends, who will generally take his side in case of conflict. Even when they are aware of the abuse, few friends provide advice or support. In fact, they may trivialize the wife’s experience and compel her to not call the police (so as not to jeopardize the immigration status of the husband).

Isolation by ethnic community and other institutions: New immigrants often associate with other members of the same ethnic community. They are sometimes forced to do so due to the divisions of US society (which many find to be divided by racial and class lines), and many choose to do so, to try and replicate the kind of support that they have at home. Victims of DV, however, find the ethnic community unwilling to treat DV as a real problem for two reasons. First, they believe DV to be a private problem rather than a community problem, and second, they deny the existence of DV in order to uphold the image of a ‘model minority.’ (In fact, Abraham briefly discusses the difficulty involved in studying DV in a community that doesn’t consider DV an issue).

Lacking support in their own community, victims may also be hesitant to approach the police or the court systems for help, believing there to be, or having experienced, stereotyping or systematic bias in these institutions. (It is important to note that they may have been convinced of the inaccessibility of the institutions by their spouse).

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In many cases, all 3 forms of isolation overlap – women who are isolated and mistreated by their husbands are unable to develop effective social support systems; and as a result, are unfamiliar with outside support systems. Cultural notions about marriage and partnership may also make it hard for women to leave. For many of the interviewed women, even when other forms of abuse were present, they found that the social isolation was often the most disempowering part of the DV experience.

Abraham recommends that communities break down the “wall of isolation” by welcoming new members into their midst and helping them integrate into the new culture, by recognizing diversity (in other words, understanding that not everyone fits the model minority stereotyping), and by redefining the chauvinistic nature of many SA cultures so that DV is seen as a community problem.

[For more information, see: Abraham, M. (2000). Isolation as a Form of Marital Violence: The South Asian Immigrant Experience. Journal of Social Distress and the Homeless, 9(3), 221-236.]